Honestly I never thought this would be my reality. I really believed my ex and I would last forever. I didn't just love him, he was my best friend. We had so much fun together, just doing stupid things like grocery shopping or going to Target. We would have been together forever....if alcohol hadn't happened.
But you pick yourself up and you move on.
The worst part about dating again after divorce is the baggage. You can never trust blindly like you did when you were young. You hold everyone back because you are afraid of them hurting you. You (may) have a child, so you want to protect them too by not letting some rando into your life.
I started dating again about a year after we separated and it has been pretty much downhill ever since. Given all of my experience (bah ha ha ha ha), here are my thoughts on dating in your 30's:
- Online dating is the devil. It gives free license to be a dirty freak or downright rude.
- The next best thing is NOT one swipe away.
- I don't have time for bullshit or head games. My life is really busy between work and Max. Just say what you think. It really isn't that hard!
- If you have kids, your best bet is probably to date someone with kids. People without kids say they understand but they really don't. (I'm looking at you, Dude who told me to get a better babysitter so we could stay out later!)
- Try really hard to not take things too seriously. The minute you overthink a text or a call, it starts to go downhill.
- Remember that you are worth it. Don't waste time on someone, just to be with someone.
- Being alone is hard but it isn't going to kill you.
My goal during this "journey" is to just keep laughing......