Thursday, January 7, 2016

The Year of Not Giving a F#*k

That is my plan for 2016.  I am no longer going to give a fuck.  I plan to shed the bullshit this year and learn to prioritize.  Take notes because you should be doing it too.

First, I am going to learn to love myself.  Not all that hugging a tree crap (sorry yogis).  I mean love myself by making Alex a priority.  Eating good food.  Taking care of my appearance.  Making time for me.  Working out regularly.

My first step in this was to a hire a babysitter for every Saturday am.  For two hours, it is all about me.  I plan to do my long runs at this time.  But if it is too cold and raining, I will just get coffee and a manicure.  It is important that I have a moment of my week where I can do the things that make me feel like a human being and not just Max's mom.

Second, I am going to surround myself with love and support.  I have great friends and an amazing family.  But on New Years eve, the only texts I got were from my parents and my sister.  That sounds so pathetic but part of that is on me.

I am so exhausted sometimes that I ignore people and I cancel plans.  I am not making excuses, I am just stating reality.  If I want people to care about me, I have to show them that care in return.

The other side of that coin is to get rid of all the bad people.  The ones that make you feel bad.  This sounds ridiculous and petty, but are they worth the $10/hour for a babysitter?  If not, cut them lose.  I may have less friends but they will at least be quality friends.

Third, I am going to accept the things I can't change.  Many things are outside of my control.  Max's dad spending time with him.  My nanny showing up to work each day.  The behavior of my co-workers.  All outside of my control and I am going to learn to let those things go.  I obsess about these things till I almost feel sick and I refuse to do that any longer.

All of these things weighed me down in 2015.  They wasted my time, made me sad, and kept me up at night.  I intend to shed these worries in 2016.  2016 is the year to fly!

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