Here we are twelve days into the month and I am finding the yoga challenge to be a little bit difficult. It isn't that I am not bendy enough. Or that I don't like yoga. Or that I don't have enough free time.
My problem with yoga is that I can't clear my head.
On the first day of the challenge, I was laying on my floor, in pigeon pose, texting a customer. The next day I tried to do it with Max sitting next to me watching cartoons. Nothing about Transformers: Rescue Bots says relaxation and I finally gave up.
Since then I have found that the entire time I am sitting "still" and breathing deeply my mind is racing. I fix my ponytail, adjust my sports bra or pick dog hair off my pants. I think of the things I have to do. My mind continuously drifts and I have to force it back. The hamster wheel literally never stops turning.
Because of this, I am not really enjoying this challenge. When I run or do other workouts, I am just focused on breathing and staying alive. When I do Barre3, I am just praying that my legs don't collapse. There is no time for other thoughts, so I feel really light and clear after my workout.
Yoga isn't giving me the same feeling. I just feel really frustrated when I am done. But I am determined to stop the madness and find the peace and quiet that I crave. So I push on in hopes of that calmness.
But a small part of me wonders if I am just not made for that type of calm. Maybe my peace comes in the middle of a grueling long run. Or at night when I lay in bed with a book.
We will see what happens in the next 19 days!