Do you ever feel like a fisherman/fisher-lady (thank you very much)? That is how I feel some days. Like I am blindly casting in a lake or the ocean, hoping that something catches. I know nothing about fishing so just go with this analogy for right now.
My life (especially because of one little monkey) is a lot of juggling balls. Work, Max, being healthy are just a couple. I want to have friends and hopefully one day a relationship. More balls in the air. Add in school conferences, my part time job and making sure Max wears green to school on Tuesday (why???) and I feel like there is always something that I am missing.
In an effort to achieve all of these goals, get all these things accomplished, check off my to do list, and so on, I sometimes make half assed attempts at said project so I can say I am done with it. But in reality those half assed attempts mean I am always coming back to said project to fix my mistakes.
Hence me being the world's worst fisher-lady. It is a lot of casting my line and hoping that something bites. Because I don't always know what I am doing. And I am only giving fishing about 20% of my attention. So I am really doing this blindly. (Still an analogy... I am not actually talking about fishing)
A lot of people talk about mindfulness and focus. I am incredibly focused at times. But I am also an extreme multitasker. I eat breakfast while walking the dog. I put on makeup while driving (don't tell my insurance). Today I was on the phone with a customer, while simultaneously stretching my feet (Best Purchase EVER) and typing an email. How can I do all of these things well when I am only giving them some of my attention? Does it makes sense to do something half assed and then have to redo it?
This winter I made a promise to myself. When I came home from work, I would put my phone away till Max went to bed. Being on my phone makes him act out, then I get annoyed because I can't focus, and it becomes a vicious cycle. I decided that he needed me to be more mindful of our time together. It has been hard juggling work with that time offline but I am making it work. Max is most important and I have found our nights go a lot smoother without the power struggle.
So how can you be more focused in other areas and still get everything done? This is what I have found that works:
- Multitask when it doesn't matter. Def catch up on your favorite show while running on the treadmill. Talk on the phone while painting your nails.
-Handle your most important tasks first. I make a to do list each day and I tackle the most important things early in the morning, when I am fresh and the office is quiet. If it doesn't get done by 9am, there is a good chance that it won't happen today.
-Take time to turn everything off. I have recently gone back to real, honest to god, made from paper books. I can turn off my brain better when I don't have a device in my hand. It allows me to enjoy the story without stopping to check my emails or troll instagram.
-Make time to work out. When my day is crazy, nothing clears my head better than a workout. A lot of days I only have time for 30 minutes but afterwards I really feel amazing. I know it seems silly to add another thing to my to do list each day but working out is important to me, so I make it a priority every single day.
-Make a list and check it twice. I have lists for my lists. It is the only way I can remember all the details and get everything done!
Given all of this, I still don't really know what I am doing on a daily basis. I figure that if I get up every day, make a solid effort at not fucking everything up and go to bed relatively happy, then we will call that day a success.